The numbers above are actually super important, and they just made everything seem so much more manageable.
24 is the number of days that I have class still.
38 is the number of days until I should be home.
It's gonna be strange, being home for more than a few days. It doesn't even feel like it was that long ago that I moved up here, and I was actually excited to just not be at home anymore.
It's gonna be strange waking up in a bed that I don't have to feel around for a chair to step on so I can get down. I actually REALLY like sleeping top bunk as long as there's head room.
It's gonna be strange cooking for myself all the time again, and not just walking down to the Marketplace or the Haven, as much as I kind of hate them some days.
It's gonna be strange not seeing all the guys I'm used to seeing. As much as I want to kill some of them like everyday, they've become important to me. I know right now I say I'm gonna come back on weekends, and I really intend to, but I'm afraid that with the way things happen at college, that I'm just not going to remember or be able to give up the time.
And it's gonna be downright stressful starting as a transfer at a new school, just like it was when I moved here.
I know change is good, and it'll be a change that will be great for me. It's always easier to just sit with the way things are, but I can't stay here, regardless of how easy it would be to just put up with the stuff that I don't like and pretend it doesn't bother me that much.
I already feel it after just one year, I feel like a burnout. I had a lot going for me, and I tossed it all away. And if I stay here, a burnout is exactly what I'm going to become, because I just don't have my normal passion when I'm here.
John Kenneth Brian Freaking Steele is no fucking god damn burnout.
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