The school week. Moderately well. Some things could have gone much better, however somethings Im very happy about.
Band life. We had our first evening practice which went alright. I had hoped that something different would have been on the agenda for that practice, but I was wrong. But it's not the practice that gets me to think, it's what happened right near the end that cast the spark into the pool of gasoline that is my brain, which actually made a very good transition sentence.
So Im still at the peak of drama and I still hate it. I was truly hoping that it would have all been settled by now. I talked with the other person who seems the be the mirror of myself right now. That becomes a but hard to explain but I'll say it as I see it. There's two sides of this. I seem to be the biggest part of the problem on my side, and I feel that he is the the equivalent to his side. Well I talked to him some, and it's obvious that there are things that are purely between us to settle. I proposed a meeting of everyone to clear everything. Well Im finding it nearly impossible to get everyone together, be it the way they want it or simply how nobody has a mutually free time.
Until this meeting, I said that I had no intention of talking about it at all, and that I would act as if nothing was wrong. I take it that for the most part they choose to do the same, though nothing has changed. I still feel like the masks are firmly in place, that things are still being hidden and that nothing is right yet. Im just super frustrated is all with the whole situation and want it resolved. But to do that everyone is going to need to be there because I miss my friends, and by that I mean my real friends, not the painted on faces that I feel have surrounded me for some time now.
I wish I was smarter than this.
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